So what happened? I still don’t know the full story. He lied to me. He lied to his family. Did he not want to be a doctor? Why didn’t he at least get the MD first? Having an MD doesn’t require that you become a doctor but having that piece of paper would open a lot of employment doors. Did he commit some kind of academic fraud and get kicked out? Did he actually fail the Step 1 and was too ashamed to tell anyone?
I ended up staying with him for another 18 months after this. My trust was broken, but he was charming and fun and had a rocking body. I was still in love. I thought I could regain that trust. He ended up self-employed (unemployed) for those 18 months. He made more questionable financial decisions with money he didn’t have. I felt so guilty for fearing our future finances, because people in love aren’t supposed to care about money, right? He could never give me a non-fraudulent plan to manage that debt. He gas-lighted and manipulated me emotionally, something he’d never done before dropping out of medical school. I think his own life was in such a downward spiral that he was trying to assert some control in the only way he could – psychologically.